Men’s Mental Health and Social Connections: Breaking the Silence, Building Support

Men and Mental Health: Why We Don’t Talk About It

Talking about feelings doesn’t always come easy for guys. We grow up hearing stuff like “man up” or “boys don’t cry,” so admitting you’re struggling can feel weird or weak. But here’s the hard truth: mental health issues like anxiety or depression hit guys, too. Nearly 1 in 10 men say they feel anxious or down every day, and shockingly, fewer than half of those guys ever get any help. That means a lot of blokes are going through it without talking to anyone.

This silence hurts. Men often bottle things up or try to cope with anger, drinking, or extra work instead of saying, “Hey, I need help.” Research shows that because we’re taught to be tough and avoid anything “weak,” many men mask depression with aggression or risk-taking, which goes unrecognised as a cry for help. The truth is, seeking help doesn’t make you less of a man; it makes you smart. Even top athletes face this: NBA star Kevin Love shared he had panic attacks during games and started seeing a therapist. He later said mental health “touches all of us at some point or another.

How to break the ice:

• Talk to someone you trust. Pick a mate, your partner, a family member, or a coach, and just say how you feel. Often, they’ll be more understanding than you expect.
• See a professional. Therapists and counsellors get it. There are even ones who specialise in men’s mental health.
• Use helplines or text lines. Not ready to chat face-to-face? Calling a crisis line or texting a support service, such as calling or texting 1737, can be a way to open up, even anonymously.
• Remember, it’s normal to need help. Lots of other guys feel like you do. Taking action now can stop things from getting worse.

   

Social Connections and Men’s Health: More Than Just the Gym

Your health isn’t just about lifting weights or running miles. Hanging out with friends and staying involved with people can do wonders for your body and mind. In fact, science says it’s almost like medicine. One big review of 148 studies found that people with strong friendships and community ties are about 50% more likely to live longer than isolated folks. On the flip side, loneliness can be as bad as chain-smoking for your health².

Even a little socialising can help. A 2023 report looked at over 28,000 older adults and found that those who met with friends or family regularly lived longer than those who never socialised. Each step up (seeing someone occasionally, monthly, weekly, or daily) added more years. Translation: even weekly catch-ups or a quick phone call can pay off in health.

Joining clubs or groups is golden. A team sport, a gaming group, a music band, or even a book club gives you a built-in support crew. These connections relieve stress, give you someone to vent or laugh with, and remind you that you’re part of a tribe. One famous study of Harvard alumni found that the men who were happiest in their relationships at age 50 were the healthiest at age 80. The key takeaway? Strong bonds predict long, healthy lives.

Easy ways to build your social life:

• Join a group or class. Whatever you enjoy, a soccer team, boxing class, or a chess club – it gets you around people.
• Plan regular meetups. Even one night a week to hang out, watch a game, or grab dinner with mates makes a difference.
• Mix exercise and friends. Instead of solo gym time, play tennis with a buddy or join a cycling group.
• Keep it consistent. If life’s busy, at least shoot a text or quick call to check in. Those small connections add up.

   

Doctors say our social lives should be a “vital sign” just like blood pressure⁶. So don’t ignore it. Take that invite to go out, or make one. It can lower stress, keep your mind sharp, and yeah, even add years to your life.

Taking care of your mind and your social life are two sides of the same coin. Opening up about what you feel and hanging out with friends both show strength and wisdom. It’s okay to reach out. Lots of blokes do it. It just takes one step. If you’ve been putting it off, you’re not alone.

References:

1. Sileo KM et al. (2020). Dimensions of masculine norms, depression, and mental health service utilisation: Results from a prospective cohort study among emerging adult men in the United States. Am J Mens Health. 14(1):1557988320906980.
   
2. Holt-Lunstad J et al. (2010). Social relationships and mortality risk: A meta-analytic review. PLoS Med. 7(7):e1000316.
   
3. Martino J et al. (2015). The Connection Prescription: Using the Power of Social Interactions and the Deep Desire for Connectedness to Empower Health and Wellness. Am J Lifestyle Med. 11(6):466-475.
   
4. Godman H. (2023). Even a little socializing is linked to longevity. Harvard Health Letter, July 1.